square one.

everytime we start talking bout the scar in our hearts, things always ain't that good. I always end up crying. To a certain extend I begin to doubt the reason I cried. Was it too much for me to handle? Was I still missing something I can never reach? Was I feeling awful for what I've done? Was it me who had hurt you so much? Was it because I couldn't learn to love you?

I had you so heartbroken for the past months. You always said there were more happy scenes than this. I hope so too. But I do know how broken hearts are difficult to mend. You know, I thought to myself, if I had stuck to you, I wouldn't have fallen for Edmund, and you wouldn't felt so broken. I can't tell how much I appreciate you for not giving up on me. You, for trying all you can to show me how unconditional love is, trying all you can to fix me.

I really thought we made it. But I do know how it doesn't always fall to place. When we saw him, there will always be a scar in you that you probably can never erase. As me for, I can never just pretend I never liked him. Probably things were over, probably I am running away, but at least I'm sane at the moment. I still know, you should be the priority. I can't betray you twice. I pinky promise you, I won't.

Sometimes I wonder, if it is because you seem so much to be the perfect package for me, that I came back to you, or was it meant to be. I couldn't get use to being public. I guess I still want to keep it quiet until Edmund leaves. I always look you in the eyes, and I knew how much you love me, and how I couldn't understand why haven't I truly fell for you? Was it too late?

I knew we needed time, probably gonna be long time, but I want to be the best like you said I am.